My mother got retirement yesterday, the 30th November’2010. After passing the different experiences of her service life, finally she got the retirement from the teaching job in a Government Higher Secondary school. Yesterday she simply recalled her the then principal sir who highly encouraged her to continue the job only for the future of her kids. She was supposed to resign her job due to the married life for which she surrendered years back.
We belonged to a joint family. Joint family is such type of platform where people get the chance to over come the entire obstacles faced in their lives. Those who do not get the chance to experience of a joint family, I personally believe that they have missed one important phase of their lives. People who miss the chance to stay in hostels are quite unlucky to experience something important in life….just like the hostels, joint family is such type of place where you become quite matured after facing some very rare incidents within the family and you will get prepared to same situations in your coming future also.
We also faced lots of situations which we never imagined to pass by in our lives. These are completely family matters….but still some thing common with other people also who are facing same type of routine at present also.
We were two families…we and our uncle’s family were staying together for almost 20 years. In this long 20 years, we got the chance to know our own blood, got the chance to experience some sweet moments also. My mother was a working lady and in the same house my aunty was a house wife…so things were quite different from the beginning. From a joint family, where family members are almost 15 including our ill grand parents, it became quite difficult to maintain the job for my mother.
But still she managed the things some how…ignoring all the obstacles lying ahead her. She knew it very well that only to feed her kids she had to keep her job, because my father got retirement when I was in the 8th standard. So from that period to till date, she maintained every thing smoothly without giving us any problem.
Now when I came to know some experiences of my friends who are facing them at their in laws joint family, I found quite similar some matters. Things are not changed. Those situations which my mother faced 40 years back are quite similar to those which my friends are facing now. The mentality of the people, the mentality of the Saas Bahu are not changed….the silliest quarrels between the Saas Bahu and the sister in laws are quite same.
In the midst of Guwahati city, my friend is facing the silliest problems with her in laws. She is a working lady and due to her job, she arrives at home at the evening daily. But surprisingly she has to serve all the family members of her in laws who are staying at home the whole day. After the hectic schedule of her office duty, she simply wants one cup of tea from the family members…but instead of giving her the tea, she has to serve the family members with the snacks which she prepares after arriving at home. The other members use to watch the TV all the time…..she even finds her wet clothes outsides alone after the rain….she can not ask her sister in law to do her works as her sister in law is equally qualified. These things make her frustrated sometimes and insist her to stay alone with her husband. She manages the things at her best, but sometimes she surrenders herself with all these things which she never faced in her life. She even never imagined such type of situations which she never faced earlier because of their single family.
Though we are stepping forward to the modern world day to day ignoring the distances between the places, but we are spreading the distances between family members ignoring the sentiments and emotions….I feel so.